I’m a Redneck and Damn Proud


Ok I admit it I am a redneck, I wear blue jeans every day, and t-shirts, I either wear work boots or cowboy boots and I always have a ball cap on. I like big trucks with big tires and loud mufflers, I like supped up late model cars, but I really don’t like mustangs, seems like everybody has a mustang in this town, me I want a 1970 Pontiac GTO Judge or an Oldsmobile 442 or even a 1967 Pontiac Bonneville 2 door. I hate mini vans even though I own one and I hate those little cars that zip around all over the place with their loud music and fucked up sounding mufflers that make the car sound like a baby crying, stupid just stupid. I like country music and some death metal and 80’s glam rock, death metal is just cool my oldest son turned me on to it. I don’t even remember the name of the band it is in my van I think it is Dragon something.

I hate the city but it is more convient for me right now to live here and yes I want to be in the country but I want to do it on my terms and in my own place. Nothing big like I grew up on just an acre would be good for me and fairly easy to take care of.

I like to drink beer and sit in the shade of a big old tree and have BBQ’s with people over, hell I use beer as a timer for when I grill, two beers and flip, another two beers and flip again. I am no fan of fast cooking BBQ I like it low and slow and I cook big pieces of meat and it always comes out perfect, it is in the rub I tell ya all in the rub, and after you rub down a piece of meat you let it sit in foil and let the rub get moist from the juices of the uncooked meat and then it sticks better to the meat, this is especially true when cooking a pork loin, my specialty. Oh and leave it in the foil when you cook it and when you put it on the grill always put it fat side down and leave it that way for at least four beers that way the fat melts and juices the rest of the meat and you get a nice bark on one side. Pretty cool way to BBQ right, you get good food and you get to drink

what a spread what a spread, good eats ya’ll

cold beer, a man cant BBQ without beer, it just aint right. I have been known to imbibe in a little libation once and awhile to those not fluent in redneck terminology that is I like to drink a little bourbon now and again. Always stick with the same bourbon, one that doesn’t give you any complications, like wanting to fight or taking your clothes off. I stick with Early Times Bourbon it is smooth and easy to drink and I know how it affects me, same way every time, I get mellow and quite funny and then I go to sleep, that’s it. Now I drink beer more than Bourbon so it is always good. And yes some of you are thinking that I shouldn’t be drinking at all with the multiple medications I have in my system, but it sure is hard not to especially on a hot June day, I can hear it calling my name. Bad luck for me is that we are staying with my mother in law and she doesn’t want me drinking anything here. I can’t even go to the bar and have a few cause she don’t want me to come back to the house smelling like beer, I mean really what is a fellow supposed to do? Well me and my redneck ways will part with you for the time being, hope I didn’t bore you to death with this, but I thought it was cool something different than what I usually write, and true as hell.

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4 Responses to “I’m a Redneck and Damn Proud”

  1. Love this, man. The beer timer, that is priceless advice; we’re having a BBQ next weekend!

  2. Bourbon Says:

    Haha what you said about beers being your timer made me chuckle! Your BBQ’s sound scrumptious

    • we do it full out, with green beans, mashed potatoes or sometimes potatoe salad, well hell you name it we cook it, it is never a small affair and we love having lots of people, and everyone having a good time and be sure to bring the kids we will light a fire and make smores

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