Something from a different place…..


shining_hope

You all have seen me all over the place in the feelings department but lately a reader has been asking me questions about some thing that is very important to him, he has yet to post on my site but I have taken a very keen interest in his question. I have replied to it here and as I have said it is very different from the normal things I write about, so please read it with an open mind and an open heart. It still fits neatly into my realm of thinking but it has reminded me that there are somethings that need to be addressed and I hope that I have answered his or her question to the best of my ability.

You always want to know where your place is or rather what importance you are in some others life, when it seems like you are on the outside and you know that you are down at the bottom end of that person’s life, it hurts. No matter if that person is supposed to be your friend, girlfriend, boyfriend even husband or wife, it hurts. They talk to you of only trivial things, never anything of substance. It is very frustrating when you want to be the center of that persons attention, but you have that creeping nagging feeling and you know that you are not the most important person in this other person’s life. So what do you do? Do you whine? Do you beg? Do you tell this person that you want all of their attention; well you see it is never that easy because unless that person really wants you to be the center of their life then you will never be no matter what you do or if you do all or none of those things I have listed before. Again I ask what do you do to become the center of their life, nothing there is nothing you can do that will make any more of an impact on them than what you have already done. You know that you could be the best thing in this person’s life; you know you will treat them better than they have ever been treated before. You know you don’t have much in the way of material things to give them, not much money, not a very promising future, but you have things still that you can and would give them, love, smiles, hugs, friendship and trust, that they will never have to fear from you the things they have feared from others. To some that is a lot, to others it is trivial and they still continue on the path they have led before to the same places, to the same problems and to the same people. It all seems so frustrating doesn’t it?

So you wait for a call a text or even the slightest chance that you will see this person, it moves within you like a fire waiting to be released, but you wait and you know in the end that you will not be chosen, that they will choose another as they have so many times before.

You see I write exactly what I feel and sometimes that doesn’t come across as right or wrong, it disturbs people that I can put words onto paper or in this case a screen that I am unable to do verbally, I have always been able to write the way I feel better than I can verbally communicate any feelings to any other person.

You see you have to understand what this other person is telling you, that they need to get their head straight, that they have other things that they need to take care of, you should give this other person all the room in the world, if only they would let you know that you would have the chance to make them happy right? This other person is confused, probably hurt and not a little bit scared, you should never push yourself onto this other person, never make demands that are unreasonable, although from my previous writing it seems that what I am saying is being a bit selfish and perhaps that is true. But you need this other person to understand what you have to give them, who you are and what your dreams are. I feel that sometimes it is hard to communicate with another person that you have strong feelings for, you see you are vulnerable, scared and you don’t want to be excluded from that person’s life.

Here is what I think that should happen, you should stop being afraid and tell this other person how you feel, I know easier said than done I have been in the same place you are. But you need to know, you need to have a sense of contentment that you can and will be all the things that this other person wants and needs, you see it sounds like you have great feelings for this person and I would hope that this person sees this as a chance to live, to be loved, to have a friend that could and would share all of their thoughts, hopes and dreams with. I really cannot give you any better advice because you see I am in the same boat that you are. We can only hope that the ones we show affection towards will return the same affection, that they will choose a different path this time. Hopefully you will become the one they walk down the road with in the future. I am glad you posted to me this has been very hard for me to answer, mostly I get questions about anger, depression, resentment, rage well you have read my blog and what I have had to write about and the questions that have been asked of me. This is not usually the type of thing I get to write about much, and please from now on fell free to ask your question directly on my page no need to send me an email, or if you prefer keep sending me emails I think you want to remain under the radar. But all in all I am glad that you read my blog and I really want to know how this has worked out for you in the end. Remember we all have a hard time being strong, but I feel that with patience and persistence all things can be achieved.

With much dedication and gratitude,

Dan Kline

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