Laying in bed…..

So I lay there awake at 3am lying in my bed with another next to me, wondering what the hell am I doing, who is this person I just spent the last 7 hours with, who is she? This is not me, why am I doing this? This is really not what I want; this is not where I want to be. Then I thought I don’t really don’t know where I want to be do I? The voices in my mind told me not to do this but some primal urge kept me going, was it just to prove that I could still make a woman attracted to me, was it that I needed to feel wanted by someone, was it out of spite, was it out of revenge, I think that all the answers above are correct, hell I just met her and now I am sleeping with her, not my usual method of operation. I don’t feel right, I feel like I have just done something wrong. Now understand it was good but it was wrong, my phone is ringing, I know who it is but I am pretending to be asleep, I will figure this out before I talk to her again. It isn’t fair to her that I don’t answer but I am completely confused, no I wasn’t drunk, no I wasn’t doing drugs, but I did it anyway. She is a very nice woman and I don’t want to hurt her by thinking this was a one night stand. But do I really want to go forward so soon and still with the way I feel in my heart. It is something I am going to have to face.

Was it all a dream, was it really real…..

With much love and gratitude,

Dan Kline


2 Responses to “Laying in bed…..”

  1. Well it is not normal it is about imagined emotions, the what ifs if i ever do this, mostly it is about emotions involved…..

  2. Gosh your sounding NORMAL here…Dan everyone I know has been in this space. Be as honest as you can be with her and take more time if you need it. Don’t continue on a road if your going to feel bad for being on it. Take care, Shannon

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